Monday, May 31, 2010

just one of those things about my life.

i slept horribly last night due to some major anxiety.  i know that dave's job promotion is a great thing overall for us, but i can't help but be stressed and nervous about the changes in his work schedule and the amount of hours he will be away from me.  i might sound like a crazy, over-reliant person, but i don't really have any friends where we live and it gets lonely for me a lot.  i love staying home with my kids and wouldn't trade the time i have with them for anything, but that doesn't mean it's easy for me.  the friends that i do have all live so far away and i basically survive socially through the phone and facebook.  i've been told (more like lectured) numerous amounts of times (by way too many people) that i need to join a mommy group.  i can't really explain why i haven't, but something holds me back.  i don't particularly like where we live and do not see myself here for the rest of my life.  maybe that's it.  maybe i don't want any attachments here because i want to get out so bad?  hm.

sorry to start this post off in such a depressing fashion, especially after not blogging for the past 2 days.  i'm sure you all feel like hearing about my issues.

13 comments:

  1. Let me know how that dress works out for you! I'm considering it myself. Super pretty!

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  2. I'll be posting a review as soon as I get it. It's so hard waiting for my Anthro goods, but I don't have a store near me. This dress was a late mother's day gift from my husband. He picked it out for me from the site with no help from me whatsoever! What a guy! :)

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  3. Wow, your hubby has great taste!

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  4. Wow! What a great present!! As someone who has moved several times, I can appreciate the loneliness of being without close friends. Maybe a mommy group isn't for you, but maybe something else is. Whenever I move to a new city, I join a running club. I've never found a BFF that way, but it helps me start meeting people with a common interest. Find something that will get you started. It's nice to have friends in different places.

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  5. Chrissy - My husband has a really good eye for what will look good on me. And the MBMJ Faridah was also something he totally surpirsed me with a couple of birthday's ago. I use that thing practically everyday... it's starting to look a little grungy, but i really don't care :)

    Cat - The dress is an awesome present - especially in the middle of my shopping hiatus! I definitely need to find something around here where I can meet people. It's just really dificult because we only have one car and my husbands work hours are going to be really crazy. He works in retail and the hours can really stink. I'm not sure if I'd be able to join a group of any kind because I wouldn't be able to participae in a consistent way. It's frustrating, but I'm sure I'll figure something out. Thank you so much for the advice. I really appreciate it. I never actually thought of trying to get involved in something that didn't involve my kids. Haha! Duh.

    Tina - Me too. :( Hope you and the family are doing well. I miss talking with you.

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  6. I just found your blog through another one....
    I wanted to comment on the mommy group, I kinda feel the same way, except all my friends have kids so I need a childless group! I am always trying out new groups/clubs. At least if I don't meet anyone, I'm doing something new or something that I enjoy.
    Oh, and your oufit is cute! Great gifts!

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  7. Just found your blog today! I am a stay at home mom too and we have moved around a lot. I haven't met a bunch of people so I understand the lonely feelings. I've tried a mom group but I didn't click with anyone. It's really hard meeting people. I liked Cat's suggestion of joining a group though. I've met a lot of people at the gym and several in the neighborhood. All my friends that I've met though have moved...except for one who is here for maybe another year. Then I have to start over again....frustrating!

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  8. spiffy - I think I'm just not really sure what kind of group I should join. I would do a mommy group, but I've heard those types of things can get pretty catty and mothers get really competative and such. I'm not into that kind of behavior at all. But I guess giving it a try wouldn't hurt. Thanks for checking out my blog! I actually find it funny that people actually follow this thing. :)

    Carrie - Being a stay at home mom is so tough. Especially when you move to a place where you don't know a soul. I guess I'd say trying to find a friend is like trying to find someone who is accepting applications for an opening in their group of well established friends. The older you get, it seems, the less willing people are to new people in. At least that's what I've experienced. I did have a great friend who lived near me, and we just recently had babies born 2 days apart... but then she moved 2 hours away. It was sad. But at least she gave me hope that there are people out there that are seeking friendships as well. I hope everything works out for you and you find what you're looing for. And thanks for reading through my rant of the day :)

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  9. love your ootd and new dress that is coming your way!!
    hopefully we'll get to see you this summer or fall - whenever we make it down to NC!

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  10. Thanks Ashlee! I hope we can get together too. I've also got to convince Dave to take a trip up to see you guys and all our other friends :)I'm thinking the fall is looking the most promising at this point.

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  11. My hubby-to-be is a consultant at one of the biggest companies in the world and the demands of his job sometimes can get overwhelming. We often have talks about this and he tries very hard to get home quickly even if it means he needs to work a little at home. At least he's with me. I know that's not the case with Dave, but I can totally understand your anxiety with someone being gone while you have no one around. The blogsphere is a big distraction isn't it though? :) I can try my best to keep you entertained!

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  12. Cindi - the blogsphere has really helped me out in the past few weeks. i have been wanting to start a hobby for a couple of years now, but never knew what to do. a lot of the things i enjoy doing involve either a lot of time or a lot of money, and i don't have either of those. this is perfect for me to get everything out there and vent if i need to, but it also keeps me focused on my own personal interests. it's hard being a mommy and not losing yourself in the process. it's a daily battle to do something just for ME. i have to say, i'm quite impressed with myself in making more than 20 posts in less than a month :) haha!

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